Thoughts on the Southern Hemisphere

South Africa is basically California but with much smarter people. Joberg=LA, Durban=San Diego, Napa=Stellenbosch and Cape Town=San Francisco. The food was exceptional and the white people with funny accents were very friendly and accommodating. I was shocked to see how much money the country put into revamping their stadiums. I only went to the ones in Durban and Cape Town, but they are beauties. Soccer City in Johannesburg and the one in Port Elizabeth look amazing, as well. My question is, what are they going to do with them after the Cup? I know there are competitive football and rugby leagues, but they can't be deserving of those kinds of venues. I guess we will have to see. The only thing that shocked me even more than the stadiums were how cheap everything was (especially the alcohol). The Jack in a Jack and Coke is cheaper than the Coke! It was a challenge to spend a ton of money even at the nicest restaurants and the food and service is par with NY.

I would totally go back there on one condition: No football.

If I have to have a vuvuzela blared in my face one more time I'll chew my ears off. Don't ask me how. I'll fucking do it. They were the single most irritating thing about the World Cup other than the refs' ineptitude. The locals who actually knew how to use them and produced a sound that didn't remind me of a fart were fine. It was the drunk foreigners who turned what could have been a cool gimmick into a cluster fuck of bodily gas. One of the great things about being at a football match live are the chants and songs of the fans. It was non-existant at this World Cup because they were drowned out by or distracted by the vuvuzelas. What a shame.

Other than that, South Africa is an amazing place; especially Cape Town - it has retirement destination written all over it. As far as World Cups are concerned, I'll be in Brazil for sure and pray that they have some device less annoying than a vuvu to amuse themselves with. I suppose it's back to my old routine and not caring about where Lebron, Wade, Bosh and Amare all end up this summer. I find it pretty absurd that a bunch of guys can just hijack a sport and decide where they are all going to play. The joke will be on them when their teams still stink and the Thunder and Lakers are the best teams in the league because one built through the draft and the other cheats.