Wow. Could anyone have come up with a better drinking combination than St. Patty's day + Opening Day of the NCAA Men's Tournament + first 60-degree weather of the year in NYC? It could spell disaster for quite a few people, but not me! I am sitting in an office trying to watch the games on my computer, yay! It's probably for the best since I went to Chicago for St. Patty's and was pretty much incapacitated by 8pm after cleaning up other people's unfinished Irish Car Bombs. Gross.
It feels great to have the Heels back in the tournament and at a #2 seed at that! I could make out with Kendall Marshall right now, and no, Kendall is not a girl despite the ambiguity of the name. He's the 2nd coming of Ed Cota except he's got lighter skin and he already has a jump shot as a freshman. God bless him. I obviously picked them to win the championship in all of my gambling situations since I am a homer but I'm not sure that they have the chops this year. I just hope that if they lose, they do it soon so I don't have to stress out about a potential Duke-UNC National Semifinal game.
The Game of Thrones TV show is coming out in a month and they announced a release date for GRRM's fifth book in his series! Exciting times for SciFi nerds everywhere. Season two of V was surprisingly entertaining even though some of the stuff that happens make no sense at all. I'm not even going to come up with examples because I am pretty sure that I am the only person that watches that show. There's not much else on TV that's been that great - Archer Season two has been pretty disappointing although it's still better than most anything else out there. Get into it if you already haven't.
You can throw Derrick Rose onto my list of NBA man-crushes along with Kevin Durant and Steph Curry. I watched him play in person and he is an athletic force of nature. I can't wait for that team to play lock-down defense and ride Rose to the finals. KD, however, has his work cut out for him in the West although I do believe they can do some damage to the Lakers with that front line now that they have Kendrick Perkins.
I'm doing some domestic jetsetting to locales I've never been to before such as Newport Beach and Ann Arbor so hopefully will have some good things to say
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
You Get What You Ask For (So Get It Cuz You Asked For It)
Over the past few years I've had an ongoing gripe with UPS and their commercials. When they unveiled their "What can brown do for you?" commercials in 2002 I was thrilled and they quickly took over the package delivery scene. It was revolutionary: simple, to the point and even gave Hindu males a line to drop on unsuspecting white chicks. Brilliant! Someone even rolled out a joke t-shirt line based off of the slogan. The unlikeliness of this succeeding in the shadow of the terrorist and anti-brown craze in this country was ridiculously high. However, the good folks at UPS rolled up their sleeve like a good Hindu would and shut shit down for five years. Bravo, Brown.
Some time in 2007, the United Parcel Service decided to go in a different direction. I don't know if they were trying to champion the cause of douchebags around the world but they decided to launch their whiteboard campaign. They tried to keep the Brown spirit alive by throwing it in at the end of these commercials but after a while it was a mere afterthought. The drawings and explanations of UPS' suite of services became so convoluted that the focus had been thoroughly shifted towards that long-haired tool. He would smugly draw his oh-so-clever machinations and it was almost as if he was saying, "Look, this WHITE guy can do really cool stuff with a WHITE board. Who cares about the BROWNS doing the actual work behind the scenes?" It was at this stage in UPS' advertising process that I would literally get on my hands and knees and beg for them to stop. I'd had enough WHITE board to last several lifetimes and even started to have violent dreams involving this guy standing over white board guy's bed while he was sleeping, waiting for him to wake up.
As you can guess, someone granted my wish (not God, unless he decided to be cruel) and on September 13, 2010, it was announced that UPS would launch their "We Love Logistics" campaign. It was to be their largest campaign yet and it was supposed to stress their Biz-to-Biz services. Now, I am a fan of logistics as much as the next guy, but setting their jingle to the old Dean Martin song titled "Amore?" What the fuck, were they trying to be ironic? There is nothing logical about "amore" or Dean Martin and 99% of the people who watch wouldn't catch the irony of the situation anyway, if that's indeed what they were going for. This is all aside from the fact that the girl's voice and the song in general is absolutely the most irritating thing I've ever heard. Of course CNBC, the god damn piece of shit channel I have to watch 10 hours a day, sells every spare second of commercial time to UPS so they can air this garbage several thousand times a day. It's come to the point where I have to hope that I'm on the phone when it comes on so I don't notice but even then there's at least one asshole pointing it out to me because I've made it so abundantly clear how I feel about it.
There is a lesson in this: If you hate low-brow crap commercials, don't complain about them because they can always get worse and someone will always get pleasure out of torturing you with it. Of course, this entire post was dedicated to how much I hate this campaign so I'll probably have something new to hate in six months. I just ask that you remember the public service I performed here and consider me a martyr when I stab myself in the heart when it happens.
Some time in 2007, the United Parcel Service decided to go in a different direction. I don't know if they were trying to champion the cause of douchebags around the world but they decided to launch their whiteboard campaign. They tried to keep the Brown spirit alive by throwing it in at the end of these commercials but after a while it was a mere afterthought. The drawings and explanations of UPS' suite of services became so convoluted that the focus had been thoroughly shifted towards that long-haired tool. He would smugly draw his oh-so-clever machinations and it was almost as if he was saying, "Look, this WHITE guy can do really cool stuff with a WHITE board. Who cares about the BROWNS doing the actual work behind the scenes?" It was at this stage in UPS' advertising process that I would literally get on my hands and knees and beg for them to stop. I'd had enough WHITE board to last several lifetimes and even started to have violent dreams involving this guy standing over white board guy's bed while he was sleeping, waiting for him to wake up.
As you can guess, someone granted my wish (not God, unless he decided to be cruel) and on September 13, 2010, it was announced that UPS would launch their "We Love Logistics" campaign. It was to be their largest campaign yet and it was supposed to stress their Biz-to-Biz services. Now, I am a fan of logistics as much as the next guy, but setting their jingle to the old Dean Martin song titled "Amore?" What the fuck, were they trying to be ironic? There is nothing logical about "amore" or Dean Martin and 99% of the people who watch wouldn't catch the irony of the situation anyway, if that's indeed what they were going for. This is all aside from the fact that the girl's voice and the song in general is absolutely the most irritating thing I've ever heard. Of course CNBC, the god damn piece of shit channel I have to watch 10 hours a day, sells every spare second of commercial time to UPS so they can air this garbage several thousand times a day. It's come to the point where I have to hope that I'm on the phone when it comes on so I don't notice but even then there's at least one asshole pointing it out to me because I've made it so abundantly clear how I feel about it.
There is a lesson in this: If you hate low-brow crap commercials, don't complain about them because they can always get worse and someone will always get pleasure out of torturing you with it. Of course, this entire post was dedicated to how much I hate this campaign so I'll probably have something new to hate in six months. I just ask that you remember the public service I performed here and consider me a martyr when I stab myself in the heart when it happens.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Happy New Year!
It's 2011? Weird. It's been a while since I've been motivated to write anything, mainly because the holidays are so taxing a season. Vegas was a resounding success despite getting decimated in blackjack. It's a good thing the nights are fuzzy because I'd probably be more depressed about it if I remembered specifics. I do, however, have some fantastic text exchanges with my friend regarding how much money we owed each other at various times during the trip. We went to L'Atelier at the MGM for dinner...so good. SO SO GOOD. It's a must-do if any of ya'll head out there. Make sure you get someone else to pay, though, because it's pretty expensive. As an aside - never play Ceelow. Just don't do it.
Something I will never understand is how a city the size, organization and savvy of New York can become completely debilitated by a snow storm. It happens every year at least two to three times during the winter and yet the city basically shuts down when it happens and people start behaving as though a tsunami is right off the coast, myself included. Granted a major blizzard is a different story but even a measly 6-12" sends us back to the dark ages. Unacceptable. Needless to say, I can't wait for 40 degree weather.
I don't have much to say about television; most of the shows have wound down and there wasn't anything overly spectacular. Dexter did not reach the heights that it did in Season Four but it was still a decent showing, overall. The Oscar movie season is in full swing and I am way behind. I'll try to catch up and drop some knowledge in the next few weeks.
I remain depressed about Liverpool. I have a feeling this will be the case for quite some time. They freaking suck. The Giants also shipped it in a big way which has made the NFL Playoffs more about praying for the demise of the Jets and Eagles than rooting for a team. I know I cussed out Tom Brady in this web log several months ago, but I will recant for this weekend. Please make Rex Ryan shut the hell up. His girth is making me ill and his mouth is even fatter than his belly. I have no opinion on who will win it all; the Pats seem like they should be heavy favorites but what happens if they have to play the Ravens again? There's no telling who could come out of the NFC, either. The Bears actually have a shot this year (puke) but that wouldn't be as bad as having to watch the ever boring Falcons or the terrible Seahawks. I guess I am rooting for Green Bay?
UNC seems like they aren't terrible, but we'll find out more when they have to play ACC competition. I made it back to MSG to watch them play Slutgers and they dispatched them pretty handily. Larry Drew II is still a mess but he may be less of one than last year. Dexter Strickland is probably my favorite guy on the team and if John Henson ever developed a jumpshot, some footwork, some muscle, some dribbling skills, a jump-hook or a free throw shot he'd be a lottery pick. Unfortunately, as it stands, he's gumby and all he can do is grab easy rebounds, dunk on alley-oops and block shots. Someone needs to spend a summer drilling him into shape so the Heels can get back on the map.
This was boring, I know. Sorry! I bid you adieu.
Something I will never understand is how a city the size, organization and savvy of New York can become completely debilitated by a snow storm. It happens every year at least two to three times during the winter and yet the city basically shuts down when it happens and people start behaving as though a tsunami is right off the coast, myself included. Granted a major blizzard is a different story but even a measly 6-12" sends us back to the dark ages. Unacceptable. Needless to say, I can't wait for 40 degree weather.
I don't have much to say about television; most of the shows have wound down and there wasn't anything overly spectacular. Dexter did not reach the heights that it did in Season Four but it was still a decent showing, overall. The Oscar movie season is in full swing and I am way behind. I'll try to catch up and drop some knowledge in the next few weeks.
I remain depressed about Liverpool. I have a feeling this will be the case for quite some time. They freaking suck. The Giants also shipped it in a big way which has made the NFL Playoffs more about praying for the demise of the Jets and Eagles than rooting for a team. I know I cussed out Tom Brady in this web log several months ago, but I will recant for this weekend. Please make Rex Ryan shut the hell up. His girth is making me ill and his mouth is even fatter than his belly. I have no opinion on who will win it all; the Pats seem like they should be heavy favorites but what happens if they have to play the Ravens again? There's no telling who could come out of the NFC, either. The Bears actually have a shot this year (puke) but that wouldn't be as bad as having to watch the ever boring Falcons or the terrible Seahawks. I guess I am rooting for Green Bay?
UNC seems like they aren't terrible, but we'll find out more when they have to play ACC competition. I made it back to MSG to watch them play Slutgers and they dispatched them pretty handily. Larry Drew II is still a mess but he may be less of one than last year. Dexter Strickland is probably my favorite guy on the team and if John Henson ever developed a jumpshot, some footwork, some muscle, some dribbling skills, a jump-hook or a free throw shot he'd be a lottery pick. Unfortunately, as it stands, he's gumby and all he can do is grab easy rebounds, dunk on alley-oops and block shots. Someone needs to spend a summer drilling him into shape so the Heels can get back on the map.
This was boring, I know. Sorry! I bid you adieu.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
